Being a parent is a boring job.

Let me start over. Being a parent is the hardest, most exhausting, most rewarding, most wonderful job that I could ever ask for you. But you know what else it is? Boring. Like mind numbing, brain cell killing, almost hilariously boring. 

Its getting asked the same question over and over and over and over again. 
Its cleaning up the same mess over and over and over again. 
Its the constant tension of watching to make sure no one kills themselves or ingests anything they shouldn't. 
Its picking up the same toys over and over and over again. 
Its having the same fight over and over and over again. 
Its dishes, laundry, bathrooms, dishes, laundry, bathrooms, dishes, laundry bathrooms. 
Its being asked by your child if you want to play and then having all the toys you were playing with stolen from you and essentially ignored until you get up to do something else (read dishes, laundry, bathrooms) and your child decides nows a good time to follow  you around again. 

Parenthood is submitting yourself to a childlike reality and exploration of all things new, dirty, gross, weird and most likely socially uncomfortable (read nose picking and poop). I find it all at once extremely difficult and insanely rewarding to watch the inner workings of a three year olds brain behind his beautiful blue puppy dog eyes. 

Children need our submission to the boring. They thrive off our attentions during the monotony and I for one am a proud parent of the boring. I embrace it, I live it, I may not thrive off it right now but I know my children do and I fully embrace it for them. I once heard it said that when they are small, if we make the small things big, when they are big, the big things wont seem so big. I hope that through this monotony I can form a bond with my children that outlasts their childhood and brings us into teenage and adulthood when things have the potential to get seriously fun! Until then, I have some squished grapes I have to go pick off the floor. 

Christmas Wassail

I never knew what wassail (wah-sul) was until I went to college and since then I've been scouring the internet for a delicious recipe!! The other night at a work shindig, a friend brought some of the most amazing wassail and we all begged for the recipe!! Thankfully she was nice enough to oblige and now I will share it with you!

This is the perfect drink for a pregnant women's holiday season. Actually anyone's holiday season if you ask me!

Combine sugar and water. Boil 5 minutes.
Remove from heat and add cinnamon sticks, allspice berries, cloves and ginger.
Cover and lets stand in a warm space for 1 hour
Strain
Just before serving add juices and cider and bring quickly to a boil
Remove from heat and serve!
Makes 36 half cup servings of deliciousness

So... What's dad supposed to do?

We encourage moms and dads to work hand in hand to have the best birth experience for them.  Many dads experience anxiety and fear at the thought of helping a laboring women and would benefit greatly from having an experienced birth professional by their side to guide them in helping their laboring partner. Take my husband for example:

He is your typical car loving, math minded, engineer type man of the house. When we found out we were pregnant with our first he was... nervous to say the least. I went into labor right around midterms (yes he was still in school) and when I went in to be induced, we had been so excited the night before that he FORGOT he had a huge midterm due by the end of that day. *cue extremely upset past dates pregnant wife!!!* I was livid! We went in to be induced and he worked on his test all morning. When contractions finally started to hit me, they hit me HARD. I needed him, someone, ANYONE desperately and my being upset didn't make any part of that experience easier. He finally finished his exam and was able to support me through the majority of the labor but I knew that I wanted something different the next time around.

With my second I employed an amazing doula. She and I were already close friends so she knew exactly what made me tick and how to read my cues. The best part was that she guided my (completely clueless!) husband in how to help me. She instructed him in "slow dancing", breathing techniques, and when to say nice things to me. It was a night and day difference! I finally got the experience of feeling like a goddess during labor and having the man that I love by my side to help strengthen me through each contraction! And he got the support he needed to do so.

So you may be saying "well we have a doula now! What's dad supposed to do?!" Or "Dads there, he will be able to handle it, we don't need the extra support." Well from one new mama to another I'm here to tell you, he may look brave, he may act the part, but nothing instills fear in a man like being the only support person for a very pregnant, very hormonal women and having absolutely no clue what to do to make her stop giving you that dirty look!

Dads can be such amazing support people and there's nothing like watching a once timid dad truly step up to the plate. Whether dad is a go-getter ready for anything that labor throws at him or a quieter voice near by, we are here to support and help you to have the best experience possible! Don't worry dads, there's still lots for you to do!

Photo courtesy of thelocketphotography.com

Poop

The unfortunate reality of my life at this time is that poop is the pervasive conversation, smell and hobby in my home. Theres something horrifying about having a small child in your home who is all at once potty learning, potty regressing and literally OBSESSED with all things poop. Needless to say, this is not how I thought my life would look 5 years ago. Thankfully, i've also been catapulted into the world of being comfortable with the conversation about poop.

As a doula this serves me quite well. For a women in labor, pooping is pretty much a guarantee. Its been said over and over that you wont know, no one will tell you, you wont even care and while all of those things are true, it can still cause a lot of anxiety about the impending labor that could even stall an otherwise healthy labor! With one of The Doula Girls by your side, I can guarantee that if its important to you, its important to us. Poop happens! Our amazing poop patrol skills at home transfer over quite nicely to a birth experience and we are on the ready to help you feel as comfortable as possible!

Got poop anxiety? Dont stress, hire a doula!

Laid in a manger

During this Christmas season, I have been reminded of one aspect of Christs' birth over and over again. As a doula, I feel so much empathy for Jesus's mother Mary and the barn that she gave birth in. Not only was she giving birth for the first time, she was also giving birth to the Savior of the world! If that isn't an immense amount of stress, I don't know what is! This Christmas season, Mary is my hero, for having faith in her body and fighting the fear that can often come with childbirth.

She showed a sense of intuition that many women envy. She is a women that I look to as someone having extreme bravery and extreme love. She is the example of a mother willing to do anything to bring her baby into the world safely, even if that meant just bringing out some fresh hay. She showed compassion for those around her and acceptance of what was to come. My hope this Christmas season is that all women can feel their worth and embrace their strength through birth, much like Mary. I hope that no women will ever have to be alone during their birth experience, a time where, more than ever, we need to support of those around us. Regardless of your religious beliefs, I hope we can remember Mary and be thankful for her example.