Let me be honest:
My husband is NOT good at positive affirmations. He does not know how to share his feelings and he is pretty much the worst at amping up a situation. I'm actually pretty sure he doesn't even know what positive affirmations are!
If you shook your head in agreement to any of these statements in regards to your partner, keep reading. I want to help your partner get better at sharing words of affirmation, especially as a new dad.
What are words of affirmation?
Words of affirmation are words said during times of struggle, saddness, hardship, or just any time that you feel like sharing positivity with someone you love. These can include things like:
You are so beautiful.
You work so hard for our family, i really appreciate you.
Thank you for being such a kind person.
You take care of me and our children so perfectly.
I couldnt do this life without your support.
Ok, Ok those may sound cheesy to you but those are words of affirmation I've actually used! The thing about words of affirmation is that they have to be delivered in a genuine way. If you would never say "you are such a wonderful person" please dont try to say that. It will sound cheesy and not genuine which is not the point of words of affirmation.
How do you use words of affirmation
Words of affirmation are used to help build up your partner and share how much you love them. They don't have to be lengthy and they don't have to be sappy. Pointing out things that your partner does that make you happy, or things that your partner gives up for your family, are great places to start.
My favorite way to use words of affirmation are during labor and postpartum. Women experience a lot of emotions as their hormones shift from mood to mood, regulating after birth. Kind words and a quick hug or kiss go a long way to flood our body with oxytocin and help us feel better after having a baby.
Practice makes perfect
Practice practice practice! Say the words out loud, even if they sound weird at first. The more you use words of affirmation with your partner, the easier it will be and the more connected you will both feel to each other.
Try it! Try something new. I promise that you will see your relationship grow in new ways and I can guarantee your wife will appreciate the words of affirmation.